Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
the night ended with taco bell and tears
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
