Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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