my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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