Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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