I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Randomize