good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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