laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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