doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
ttyl tear gas
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
