Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize