My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
