you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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