They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
high people should be assigned attendants
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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