hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
We had to coat check the pizza.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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