I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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