Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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