'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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