You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
