Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Randomize
