I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
