When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
and she was petting her beer can
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
