get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Terrible idea I love it
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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