help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
