I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
