I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
