I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize