He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize