I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
