Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Randomize
