Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
