New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
That's when you crack a 10am beer
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
