Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
