Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
