i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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