Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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