That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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