He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
