Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
do nipples grow back?
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