i always forget guys have bellybuttons
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize