So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
