How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
