i just wanna soil my oats bro
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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