talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
