C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
