Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
its not stalking. its research.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
