My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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