Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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