is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
