An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
