That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
