we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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